The closest I come to actually doing this is virtual farming virtually via MMOGs (massively multiplayer online games). Hey, you gotta start somewhere.

In a trend marketer’s view, I’m actually fantasizing about Traditionalizing (going back the tradition). Instead of acting on my fantasy, however, I am Gender Blending (playing video games, traditionally a male past time) and Coming Together (playing video games in a group).

Long before I started yearning for tradition or playing MMOGs, someone discovered that these sentiments were, in fact, widespread trends. They analyzed those trends. They helped companies build a strategy around them, so that those companies can now target people like me with relevant products. Meanwhile, the same trend marketers are busy uncovering next year’s trends.

William Higham is one such trend marketer. In The Next Big Thing: Spotting and Forecasting Consumer Trends for Profit, he has written what could be the definitive guide for companies seeking to find and exploit consumer trends.

Content

The book is divided into six very rich parts. Here’s a brief summary:

Part 1: Covers what trends are (long-term changes in consumer behavior), how they impact global commerce, and the opportunities and threats they present to a company.

Part 2: Describes what trend analysis is, why you need it, and how to formalize it into a trend marketing function.

Part 3: Details the forces that cause trends and where they happen. It educates you on the difference trends and fads.

Part 4: Teaches you how and where to identify trends.

Part 5: Tells you who creates trends, how they progress, what trends grow fastest, what influences the trajectory of a trend, and how to predict the development of a trend.

Part 6: Instructs how to integrate trends into your company strategy.

As the summary above may indicate, The Next Big Thing is a very detailed book. Yet that detail reflects depth rather than digression. Higham leaves you with a comprehensive understanding, not just an overview, of trends.

Comments

Throughout the book, Higham uses an impressive number of examples to support his points. He integrates his encyclopedic knowledge of trends and branding into a story of what trends are, how they work, and how companies can harness them. You learn about the contexts trends operate in. Instead of being a vaguely defined mystery, trends become something more predictable, more of a science.

Even the drier parts of the book–there were several–held gems. For example, there is a chapter devoted exclusively to using statistical data. That’s not very exciting, but, among other things you do learn how to recognize when marketers are manipulating data for their own advantage.

Why I recommend this book

Our world today is crowded and wired. We cycle through trends rapidly, making it hard for companies to stay informed enough to remain competitive. Even so, the study of trends is still a very new discipline, outside of fashion. This is the first book to break them down into understandable parts.

In addition, you learn to see things through a trend expert’s eyes. When I was reading the book, the knitting clubs and plate-breaking cafe I’ve come across started to make sense. They weren’t anomalies. They were signs of widespread trends. Even human history and culture starts to take on a different hue through a trend analyst’s eyes. This new perspective, along with the thoroughness of the book, made The Next Big Thing a truly valuable read.

If you need to understand and incorporate trends into your business, want to understand how trends work, or simply enjoy a well-researched book on a fascinating subject, do not miss The Big Picture.

The world of marketing is a tricky thing. Most companies need to get the word out about their new product or service, but finding the best way to do it is often easier said than done when you want to be memorable, informative and entertaining all at the same time. Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose. Lose so very badly.

Here are nine examples of poorly conceived marketing campaigns that left the companies behind them with pie on their face.

The Campaign: Panasonic Woody

The Plan: Market a new touch screen PC with Woody Woodpecker as a spokesman

The Story: Back in the 90’s, Panasonic was all about making the Japanese home PC the awesomest thing it could be. User friendly, cool and down with the modern age. So naturally they got Woody Woodpecker to be the spokesman because 200 year old American cartoons really speak to Japanese consumers. With their Civil War era cartoon tie-in secured, the marketing team took the next logical step by naming the computer “The Woody.” The Woody, as you might expect, was superior to other computers because of its touch screen capabilities, which were naturally called “Touch Woody.” When an American finally explained why this made so many foreigners laugh like children, Panasonic managed to drop the “Touch Woody” name and shift focus to some of the PC’s other features including its support system, the much more maturely named “Internet Pecker.”

The Campaign: Wang Computers

The Plan: Think up a clever, memorable slogan to advertise Wang Computers

The Story: Wang was founded by someone named A. Wang and thus never really had a chance of not being the butt of numerous jokes from the minds of 12 year olds, or just people who think like 12 year olds. Not putting much effort into bettering its image or thinking too hard on how to make the word Wang not sound like a joke, they released the slogan “Wang Cares” on a snickering United Kingdom. While it’s nice to imagine yourself as a having some manner of corporate accountability, Wang Cares sounds a hell of a lot like wankers which just means masturbators and isn’t really the most effective way to sell a computer.

The Campaign: Renault 14

The Plan: Market the Renault by drawing on its similarities to pears, since they’re kind of the same shape

The Story: Deciding that likening an ugly car to an ugly fruit was a good idea, French automaker Renault tried to launch a campaign that compared the Renault 14 to a pear. The fact that “poire,” in French, can mean both pear and gullible was apparently lost completely on the manufacturers, as was the fact that no one really wants a car that looks like a pear, basically meaning it’s a short, fat ass automobile and is the vehicular equivalent of taking a ride on that little psychic lady from the Poltergeist movies. On top of this, the car had an issue with body corrosion, leading people to start calling it “the rotten pear,” as “worthless crap” was not entirely media friendly and didn’t really include a pun.

The Campaign: Calvin Klein Scary Porno Ads

The Plan: Since sex sells, make some gritty, realistic commercials featuring young people in various states of undress

The Story: In the mid 1990’s, Calvin Klein, already pretty damn successful at what they did, decided it might be fun to make every human on earth who is not required by law to tell people when they move into the neighborhood uncomfortable by launching a series of ads featuring teenagers in a basement. Oh, and also they were mostly naked and being filmed by an unseen lecherous cameraman who asked inappropriate questions and told teenage boys they looked like they worked out. The campaign managed to get the FBI to investigate to see if anything illegal had occurred and Calvin Klein pulled the ads and issued an apology, because who knew insinuations of pedophilic porno wouldn’t capture the hearts of America?

The Campaign: Sony PSP

The Plan: Tap into the online youth market by trying to create a viral, amateur-feel campaign

The Story: Sony, generally considered by many to be pretty reliable and cutting edge when it comes to cool home electronics, decided to put the marketing of their PSP system in the hands of complete and total assholes. Treading into the dangerous waters of viral marketing, the ad agency Zipatoni made a terrible, terrible video of some dude rapping about how he wanted a PSP for Christmas and posted it on Youtube along with links to a website. That alone might not have killed Sony, but they added fake comments on Youtube and other sites, including hip slang filled conversations like this one put them over the edge:

here’s the deal::: i (charlie) have a psp. my friend jeremy does not. but he wants one this year for xmas.

so we started clowning with sum not-so-subtle hints to j’s parents that a psp would be teh perfect gift. we created this site to spread the luv to those like j who want a psp!

Wow, look at all that bad grammar, this must be legit and awesome. Let’s all get PSPs. Never once was it mentioned that Sony was behind this at all and everything was presented as being strictly fan made. The campaign was torn apart viciously and exposed over at Somethingawful.com, and managed to create near unheard of hatred amongst Sony’s target audience. Sony responded with what may be an apology but mostly comes off as the sad attempt of a clueless parent to speak the language of the kids with gems like this “As many of you have figured out (maybe our speech was a little too funky fresh???), Peter isn’t a real hip-hop maven and this site was actually developed by Sony” in it. The videos were taken down and the site now redirects to Haagen-Dazs.com.

The Campaign: Anti-Drug Campaign

The Plan: Alert the public to some of the unknown dangers associated with illegal drugs in an effort to further curb drug use

The Story: It’s not just corporate America that can screw up royally when it comes to trying to sell a line of garbage to the general public. The Office of National Drug Control Policy managed to spend nearly one billion dollars on an anti-drug campaign, including $10 million on commercials that suggested if you use drugs you support terrorism. A five year evaluation of the campaign showed absolutely nothing. No evidence whatsoever that drug use was being curbed in the slightest as a result of the commercials and advertising, which is stunning considering how those “this is your brain” egg commercials from the 80’s managed to completely eliminate heroin and crack.

Making things worse for the anti-drug campaign was some emerging studies that showed children were more inclined to be curious about trying illegal drugs after see anti-drug ads than if they had seen no ads at all, meaning the government had been spending about $1 billion to make kids wonder if horse tranquilizers were a delicious alternative to pixie stix.

The Campaign: McDonald’s “I’d Hit it”

The Plan: Appeal to the hip, younger crowd by using slang terms they’re familiar with in advertisements

The Story: Realistically McDonald’s probably doesn’t even need to advertise anymore. They’re located on pretty much every other block in every town on the face of the Earth. If you don’t know about McDonald’s at this point, odds are you will never know and likely don’t want to know.

Nonetheless, McDonald’s strives to continually think up new slogans and campaigns on a regular basis to keep themselves at the forefront of Mcminds all around the world. And back in 2005, they figured they’d be hip and trendy if they co-opted some of that hip slang the kids love so much. Unfortunately, no one on staff in McDonalds marketing has apparently ever spoken to anyone under the age of 30 in person and thus had no idea what they were talking about. The result was the “I’d hit it” campaign for their dollar menu, featuring the image of a young man staring longingly at a burger with the words “I’d Hit It” separating the two of them. This would have been fine if we live din a world where no one has a problem with someone basically saying they want to have sex with a hamburger, but we don’t. And that’s what “I’d hit it” means.

We can only guess at what marketing execs assumed it meant, but you know what happens when you make assumptions.

The Campaign: Molson Hunts for College Drunks

The Plan: Use social media to run a contest in an effort to gain cheap, easy publicity and extend the brand to target markets

The Story: Molson, one of the biggest brewers in Canada, has a pretty firm market share in the beer drinking world. But lord knows you never want to slip when it comes to advertising booze as your customer base is made up entirely of people prone to black out and forget things, so you need to keep your name on their slurry lips at all times.

Because 19-24 year olds are such a key demographic for selling just about everything, Molson launched a campaign to target university students. While legal drinking age in the US may be 21, in many Canadian provinces it’s or 19. The campaign, launched on Facebook, asked students to send in their craziest party pics in an effort to track down the top party school in the country with the winner getting a trip to Cancun where presumably they would drink tea and learn about Mexican culture. This translates into “how drunk can you get on camera?” The problem, of course, is the number of 17 and 18 year old university students as well as most schools’ desire not to be known nationally as “that drunk school.”

Universities immediately called out Molson for promoting irresponsible drinking and many parents took the time to register complaints as apparently mom and dad don’t like the idea of paying for their child’s education then having that same child’s drunken shenanigans at school used in beer promotions. Who knew? Molson ended the promotion early claiming they had only been interested in promoting school spirit and not excessive drinking, which seems like a plausible motivation for the country’s 3rd largest brewery.

The Campaign: GM Can’t Do Viral Marketing

The Plan: Use viral marketing tactics and the element of user interactivity to allow people to create their own ads

The Story: General Motors had the brilliant idea of letting the public tinker with interactive software to make their very own ads online. Anyone who’s ever seen what happens to an unlocked marquee outside of a business should know right away why this is a bad idea, as letting anyone have carte blanche to say whatever they want about your product is not a good idea. In fact, it’s hard to imagine why GM thought this would turn out any better than it did.

Nonetheless, GM rolled out their campaign which let users pick video clips, soundtracks their own text-based messages to overlay on the finished product. Predictably, negative ads were produced by the boatload. People accused GM of contributing to global warming, of making poor quality vehicles or protested the war in Iraq. And those were the “good” ones. Other people chose the more “internet prankster” tack of simply lacing their commercials with obscenities.

GM’s bizarre response was to point out how the campaign was technically a success as they’d received millions of hits and most of the responses were in fact positive, while blindly ignoring the fact they’d received so many hits due to the sharing of the negative ads and no one was watching any of the so-called positive ones.

Blogs are gaining more and more traction as a legitimate marketing tool for small business owners. They are far-reaching, cheap to produce and easy to maintain. Though not a substitute for traditional marketing materials like press releases and direct mail, blogs do provide a way to reach many people in a short amount of time. Starting one can be well worth your investment.

Here are four easy tips to help you get started.

1. Choose a blogging platform
Choose an easy-to-use blogging platform to start writing on. WordPress, Typepad and Clearspace are some good ones.

2. Figure out what to post
Here are some content ideas for your blog:

-Industry trends
-Hot topic news
-Interviews with industry leaders
-Your position on industry issues or innovations
-Book and article reviews
-Lessons learned on subjects important to your readers

You can also tie several ideas together. For example, if your company puts on a big event, blog about it. Link to news stories and pictures of the event. In your writing, relate the event to a current business issue or trend. If there’s a charity involved, mention that the recession is affecting charities, too.

3. Be a credible source
Remember that as soon as you put something in writing on the Internet, it’s out there for all to see. So be careful about what you write. Make sure you’ve done adequate research. Cite credible sources (MSNBC might be more credible than a tabloid rumor blog, for example). Cover all your intellectual bases–or someone will point out very publicly that you didn’t.

Learn how to engage your readers
Your blog’s success will depend on the number of readers you have. You can increase the number of your readers by motivating them to come back. A few things that help readers come back:

-Make sure your blog is structured in a way that’s easy to navigate, both on your company’s main website, and inside the blog’s own website.
-Link to other good blogs that relate to your own blogging topics.
-Establish links to monthly archives.
-Choose about five other blogs to read on a regular basis. Build relationships with the readers of those blogs by commenting on the posts that interest you. This way, you build a community–and people come back to your own blog.
-Share a personal story on occasion. This makes you human. Your readers get to know you as a person. They can often relate, too.
-Ask readers for their opinions at the end of blog posts.
-Join communal blogging efforts, like carnivals and guest posting.
-Humor never hurts, either.

Once you set up your blog and update it regularly, it will take on its own momentum. You’ll learn as you go. Have fun!

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Stephanie Sims is a Marketing Content Writer at ActionCOACH, The World’s No. 1 Business Coaching Firm.

Yet some infomercials leave you scratching your head in amazement. Are they really trying to sell this stuff? We collected 25 of the worst-ever infomercials, for your viewing pleasure.

25. The Shake Weight for Men

If you hate working out for hours at the gym, the Shake Weight for Men can get you, um, ripped in just 6 minutes a day.

24. The Potty Putter

There’s no place like the toilet to become a better golfer.

23. Flea Market Montgomery

Flea Market Montgomery is so much like a mini-mall that they created a rap about it.

22. Stretch Tubing

An innocent enough infomercial, until the exercise tube bites back.

21. Slap Chop

Vince Offer, otherwise known as the ShamWow! guy, is brilliant in this infomercial. “You’re gonna love my nuts…”

20. Get a Grip

I can see how this product is actually useful. But the infomercial deserves a cheeziness award for the slip at the beginning.

19. Richard Simmons

Men shake their booties in this Richard Simmons infomercial. Simmons is, as always, wearing disconcertingly short shorts.

18. Wearable Towel

Why not a robe? Oh right, they slip.

17. Extenze

Scientifically proven to increase the size of a certain part of the male body.

16. Car Credit Superstore

What makes this generic infomercial horrible is the singing at the beginning. “If you need help with a loan, baby just pick up the phone…”

15. Booty Pop

Sexy curves and the ultimate lift for your girl-booty. Perkalicious.

14. Windows 7 Party

It’s Friday night. You’ve had a long week at work. How about hosting a Windows 7 party?

13. The MagneScribe

Tired of dropping pens? The MagneScribe offers you a simple, stylish solution: Just wear one around your neck.

12. Loud & Clear

How about a personal sound amplifier for your inner eavesdropping pervert…er, ear? It even looks like a Bluetooth.

11. The Double Chin Toner

Look like you’re stabbing yourself in the throat for a firmer, younger jawline.

10. Kush: A Natural Rest for the Breast

Proper alignment for those pesky boobs. And, yes, it’s $55.

9. The Gazelle

Tony Little shows off his good piece of equipment.

8. The Snuggie

This blanket with sleeves is now a gag classic.

7. The Butt Sculpter

If you need a little pick-me-up, why not try this humptastic exercise device? (Note: This video doesn’t have audio.)

6. The Nads Bearded Lady

This woman’s pre-Nads beard and mustache makes you forget everything else in this infomercial.

5. Comfort Wipe

Extend your toilet wiping arm a full 18 inches in this first toilet paper improvement since the 1880s.

4. Great Looking Hair

Why use Rogaine when you can graffiti out your baldness with a spray?

3. The Tiddy Bear

Finally, a way to prevent seatbelt burn on your chest.

2. UroClub

Have problems controlling your bladder on the golf course? The UroClub is designed so that you can discreetly pee into the handle.

1. Hawaii Chair

Take the work out of your workout by swivelling your butt around on this bizarre chair. As seen on Ellen.

After airing a Super Bowl commercial last night featuring men singing in their underwear, Dockers is giving away free khakis in a a raffle. You enter your name, gender, email address, and ZIP code to enter. Next, you click on an image of khaki pants. They slide away and tell you if you won. If not, you get a coupon code for 15% of a pair of men’s Soft Khakis. You can play every day up to February 15.

The Dockers Free Pants campaign is doing really well. It started by shocking and possibly confusing people with a Super Bowl commercial featuring some not-terribly-attractive men wearing less than you would want.

Next, it lured in Web users with a promise of free pants. Before you get a chance to win those pants, they acquire information about you that will be useful for marketing purposes. If you don’t unclick the default newsletter selection, they also get you on their newsletter.

Finally, there’s an interactive component. You click on pants and watch them slide away to see if you’ve won. Didn’t win? Why not buy a pair at 15% off, or just keep visiting their website for a week?

It’s a slick combination of TV, Web, and interactive advertising. And it appears to be working very well for Dockers.

Snickers Game

Worth it just to hear Betty White say “That’s not what your girlfriend said…”

Doritos Dog Collar

When anti-bark collars strike back.

Bud Light Can House

Those Bud Light cans aren’t empty…

Audi Green Car

Watch out for the Green Police.

Doritos’ Boy Slaps Man

Classic.

Honorable mention:

The Boost Mobile Shuffle

When they shuffle, they mean it.

You can go here towatch all the super bowl commercials online.

[Source] –

Pepsi launched Pepsi Refresh today, a massive social media campaign through which consumers support social causes. The New York Times has more:

The brand is dedicating at least $20 million through the end of the year for donations to local organizations and causes proposed by the public in realms like health, arts and culture, the environment and education. Ideas for Pepsi Refresh grants can be submitted each month to a Web site (refresheverything.com), where computer users can subsequently vote on the ideas suggested during the previous month.

The emphasis the campaign places on social media demonstrates how “a big brand is letting what used to be called the audience take part in what can become a movement,” said Gene Liebel, partner for user experience at Huge in Brooklyn, which is handling tasks like the development and design of the refresheverything.com site.

Pepsi Refresh’s massive media blitz started today, according to the NYT. Kevin Bacon and Demi Moore mentioned Pepsi Refresh on this morning’s “Today” show. Facebook, AOL, Hulu, NBCU, MTV, Parade, ABC, CBS, and a slew of other publications are featuring content or ads for Pepsi Refresh, writes the NYT.

This is a big company devoting big money to a big campaign. Their currency? Votes and chatter. The lesson? Social media marketing is officially huge.

Todd: In order to fix our financial problems, the US government needs to start over; by firing every incumbent and replacing them with the top talent in each segment.

Patrick: In order to fix our financial problems, the US government needs to remember where it came from.

Danny: In order to fix our financial problems, the US government needs to sit down, shut up and pay attention.

If you’re one of the winners, PrintRunner will email you a code that you can use to obtain your free card at checkout. Todd and Patrick, I need your email. Please send it to info – at – businesspundit – dot – com, and I’ll get you hooked up with those free cards.