This is pretty funny. I particularly like this part about work:
Why Drink on the Job?
Because most jobs suck. If you love your job, if the workday just flies by and you have to be dragged away from your desk at the end of the day, you don't need alcohol. You need a psychiatrist. If you dread going to work, if the workday drags along like a crippled slug crawling across sandpaper, if clocking out feels like a jail door springing open, then a little booze can go a long way toward making a nightmarish death march of a shift seem a hop, skip and sip through a field of flowers.
Obviously I don't endorse such shenanigans, but I still think the article is hilarious.