This Week’s Weird Jobs


Image: Consumerist/Flickr

Some jobs are very, well, nich-y.
From Twilight debater to marijuana baker, this week’s jobs would be perfect for the few people who actually fit their hairline niches:

1. CA: Team Edward or Team Jacob?

Are you a die-hard Twilight fanatic or a “Twi-hard”? Do you know more than the average fan about all the stories and characters and devote your time on forums and fan sites to learn more about Twilight?

We are looking for two debaters who will participate in an exciting live video debate on our website. One will be on Team Edward and the other will be on Team Jacob and you will convince all our viewers who Bella should ultimately choose and why.

This is your opportunity to take part in a “citizen” debate about all things Twilight and to show your passion and share your knowledge.

You must have a webcam, microphone and a fast internet connection. You should also be available during the day on a weekday. We will be giving heavy consideration to applicants who have YouTube, etc profiles with video blogs, et al that we can review.

Compensation: The live video debate will be a total of 20 minutes and you will be paid $20.

Forget the Supreme Court Justice hearings for Kagan, the BP saga, Russian spies, and other nonsuch. We got more important fish to fry.

2. CA: Avant-garde Crepe Consultant Needed

Currently we are looking for a very experienced avant-garde crepe chef/consultant to develop sweet crepe recipes for a sophisticated palette.

We are only interested in carrying out this role for a short amount of time (not full time position) in our San Francisco location, before testing it out in the real world at our cafe.

YOU MUST BE:
– Min. 3 years crepe pastry experience
– Familiar with global cuisine and flavors
– Innovative
– Creative

Please send your resume to the email above with a short cover letter.

Garçon
! Avant-garde crepes for my bourgeois bohemian palette, s’il vous plait. None of this streetside Nutella crap.

3. DC: Dog Playgroup Counselor

We are a rapidly growing Doggie Recreation Center offering dog daycare, sleepovers, grooming, and dog training.

Seeking an experienced Dog Playgroup Counselor.

Job requirements:
-Must be comfortable with large groups of dogs
-Must be comfortable with all breeds of dogs
-Must be willing to get dirty (cleaning and sanitizing play areas, picking up dog waste, etc)
-Previous professional dog handling experience a must

Must also be willing floss dog’s teeth, hand-drain its anal sacs, and restock its medicine shelf with doggie Prozac, as requested.

4. NY: Social Butterflies of New York- Club/Lounge/Nightlife Position

We are currently looking for the perfect night-time social butterfly, with enough contacts to be able to host your friends and acquaintances at one or two events per week, at your choosing and flexible around your schedule.

The clubs and venues we are associated with are strictly high-end. You invite your contacts to your event and host them with complementary drinks and/or bottles provided by the venue, in order to build up a following and base for future events.

Please send us your full name, complete contact information, some background information about yourself and a short list of your favorite nightspots. Please include a recent picture if possible.

Finally! A way to use that hospitably degree and show off your spray tan.

5. CO: MMJ Baker/Chocolatier Needed

Looking for individual with bakery, pastry, CHOCOLATE experience. Must possess or be willing to obtain Medical Marijuana License.

Part Time 20 to 30 hours a week, flexible hours

Pay is between $10 and $20 and will be determined based on experience and education. Other things I am looking for are people with strong science backgrounds, creativity, unique confectionary skills, airbrush artist.

We will strongly consider applicants who can answer the following riddle: How many baked bakers does it take to bake a batch of brownies?

Happy Friday!