A couple of this week’s job postings look like they were written by eminent or notorious figures. See for yourself what I’m talking about:
1. New York: coll. grad – – Intl Affairs
2nd assistant with outstanding administrative assistant skills for of high profile former White House cabinet member .
undergraduate degree and several years experience.
Interest in political / international affairs a +
Ability to help said former cabinet member finally explain unknown unknowns to the general public a plus.
2. San Francisco: Graveyard Corporate Travel Concierge
We are seeking experienced corporate travel consultants, ready for a change in direction, to service client members from our Tele-Center in San Francisco.
• Minimum 2 years experience as a corporate travel agent.
• Previous experience working with VIP clientele.
• Possess an exemplary positive attitude; is passionate about offering unparalleled customer service and excels in maintaining excellent associate relations
Must sound happy, fresh, and helpful at 3 a.m. Ouch.
3. San Francisco: Business Broker
Business Intermediaries assist sellers in achieving liquidity and a fair price for their business, while helping buyers successfully realize their goal of owning their own business.
We offer a generous commission schedule. Well qualified candidates typically earn first commissions within six to nine months. Our top associates earn 300K on up.
Candidates should have a strong work ethic, effective communication and persuasion skills, emotional maturity, and high ethical standards.
Note: You will be dealing mostly in broke businesses.
4. Denver: G/L writer wanted
Gay or lesbian writer (semi-professional) wanted to help with book project. Book subject:one gay man’s journey into and out of the united methodist church. Involves some research and regular meetings with me. Needed as soon as possible; previous writer working with me decided we “were not a good fit.” Whatever.
Looks like Ted Haggard is finally getting that book written.
5. Denver: MORTUARY TRANSPORT
Position requires an individual with a professional, clean appearance, and must be able to remove and handle human remains in a safe and dignified manner.
Duties & Responsibilities:
-Must be able to remove and handle human remains in a dignified and safe manner. (Ability to preform heavy lifting.)
– Required to explain and answer questions regarding services in a dignified manner to families, funeral directors. (Will provide training.)
-Must maintain good personal hygiene and a professional appearance (no visible tattoos).
– Must be able to obtain information for death calls and follow directions.
Job is guaranteed recession-proof.