This Week’s Weird Jobs

Image: Sebastyne/Flickr

If you’re snarky, aggressive, or just plain annoying
, you might find hiring gold in this week’s weird jobs:

1. SC: Bachelorette Party Entertainment

Would like to arrange a stripper (not naked) for our girlfriend gettin married…

Tonight is her bachelorette party and would love to have you show up at one of the downtown bars we’ll be hitting and give her a last hoorah!

Please let me know if you or someone you know does this kind of thing….

Note to poster: There’s no reason for an ad here. Just order a few rounds of whiskey for the hottest, dumbest guys in the bar and there you go.

2. SC: Chemist Wanted, ASAP!

Startup Bio Diesel firm is looking for a chemist to join its Executive Team.

We will first produced bio- diesel with cooking oil and graduate to a product that is gaining notice in Europe.

The equipment that will be used initially is the Fuelmeister; please Google to see how this device is used and get back to us immediately if you are interested.

The successful candidate may be offered a percentage of the firm

This job would be especially cool if you could be called The Fuelmeister.

3. IL: Catfight Models Wanted

Erotic Fully Clothed Female Fantasy Wrestling/Catfights based on customer requests. Earn $200 -$300 per nite Fri and Sat

This material will be of interest to those models who enjoy working with other female models. None violent, NONE injurious fantasy classic catfight material. You can make money several ways. Making customs, clips and pics for sale, as well as live shows

The female fight is becoming a common part in particular of any young actresses portfolio. However it is nice to have a more traditional feminine vein to perform in, without getting ones pretty face roughed up doing some kung fu :( you can even wear a disguise…makeup type mask… no talking required…

Best thing is too, keep some of your own material and sell it well into your 50’s or even 70″s.
I bet Betty Page wishes she had some of her material now, then again maybe not, she’s a devout Christian now.

No STD’s to worry about, etc etc

Fetishes explored here, revolve mainly around the legs, heels, bums, skirt dresses, panty, pantyhose hair, nails, clothes destruction, soft girl girl fight action, some scripted holds and wrestling fetish material as well.

Catfighting is a basic 50’s and 60’s fetish. It’s also a very popular and legal fetish of sorts in China via Hong Kong, India and much of the Middle East.

If you can count you should be able to realize this huge potential market. Models that come to mind include La Kisha, Betty Page, the la Belle twins, etc

Big in China, India and the Middle East, you say? What a enormous surprise!

4. DC: Spunky LOUD Hostess needed for fitness club

Looking for RACHEL RAY type of personality – fun, enthusiastic, high-energy, extremely talkative and quick with conversational comebacks!

Spunky LOUD Hostess and Fitness Lover needed for the following:

Must have a loud and happy voice, be a motivating and positive person, and work well alone and with others!

Job requirements:

– Selling memberships- must have 3 years or more of AGGRESSIVE sales background (asking people after a haircut and color if they want to buy some shampoo is NOT aggressive!)

– Greeting and encouraging members during their workout – you must be talkative and conversationally assertive

– Calling members and confirming appointments – you MUST have a great phone voice and genuinely LOVE to be on the phone- this is a BIG part of the job so move on if you hate being on the phone!

– Our employees bond with our members. It’s a community/small town-type atmosphere. This is for people who want a social, long-term job that requires them to multi-task and inspire women.

– You MUST be great under time restraints and able to wear many hats efficiently. Like many jobs, we are either slammed busy or quiet and slow. We pay $8.50/hr to start with a pay increase after the first employee review.

– Remember: you MUST have a LOUD and HAPPY voice, some experience with sales and able to multi-task. If this does not suit you, do not answer this.

Here at the fitness club, we are all LOUD and ANNOYING. Do join us!

5. DC: Pet Taxi Drivers and Dog Bather – Unique Hours

Caring for animals is one of the most therapeutic experiences. Pair that with a paycheck and you have a dream of a part time position! In fact, many of our employees would say you’d be hard pressed to find a more enjoyable “job.”

We are currently looking for 1-2 enthusiastic individuals with unique schedules that have an interest in either being a pet taxi driver or dog bather (or both if you have the time).

An ideal pet taxi driver would have availability between the hours of 7-9am and 5-7pm and must be comfortable transporting sometimes multiple dogs in their personal vehicle.

The ideal candidate for the dog bather position would be available M-F from 3-5pm. This person should be comfortable handling dogs of all sizes and breeds. Pay for both positions will be between $9.25-10/hr.

Note that if you own a Pinto and need to transport multiple dogs, roof racks are not an option.

Happy Friday!

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Written by Drea Knufken

Drea Knufken

Currently, I create and execute content- and PR strategies for clients, including thought leadership and messaging. I also ghostwrite and produce press releases, white papers, case studies and other collateral.